Thursday, March 6, 2025

 8:42pm

Good morning everybody-

even though it's not morning

Good morning everybody-

even though it feels like I'm relearning

That everything is changing

nothing is the same forever

But that doesn't change

anything

And I just feel 

like no one is listening

No, this isn't the poem 

I've been meaning to write

But I guess I can't choose

what comes to me tonight.

I didn't ask for this and

you won't ask me 

what it is

But I know

that if I try to tell you -

I know that still,

you won't listen

Drive You Home- Jackson Wang


From time to time in the midst of my good life, I feel Eun Sob's disappointment through the unwatched episode that lies at the end of our deserted show. I can hear him through the knowledge of an episode left unwatched, mourning silently. Do these people ever break? I think I'm one of them. Sometimes I wish we would. Just crumble. Just to see if anyone will pick us up. I think I did, but it didn't motivate anyone to save me; and maybe I just didn't give them enough time, because when I saw a quote that said "no one is coming to save you- get up.", I decided to get up. But maybe I needed to pick myself up because there were people around me too young and fragile to have to experience what I was experiencing, so here I am, and now I'm just feeling left behind and left alone. Can I crumble now? Can I? should I. . . 

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